[Vision2020] Trump Accepts Larry Flynt’s Ten-Million-Dollar Offer for Information Leading to His Impeachment (SATIRE)

[Tom Hansen]

Courtesy of the New Yorker at:

http://tinyurl.com/Trump-Accepts-Offer

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Trump Accepts Larry Flynt’s Ten-Million-Dollar Offer for Information Leading to His Impeachment

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Just minutes after the publisher Larry Flynt offered ten million dollars in exchange for information leading to Donald Trump’s impeachment, Trump contacted Flynt and said that he would gladly provide the information himself in exchange for the cash.

According to Flynt, shortly after their phone conversation Trump sent him a voluminous number of e-mails, phone records, and other evidence of impeachable offenses, after which Flynt wired ten million dollars to Trump’s Swiss bank account.

“That was a lot easier than I thought it would be, to be honest,” Flynt told reporters.

The swift denouement to Trump’s tenure in the White House raised more than a few eyebrows in Washington, with some insiders wondering if Trump’s eagerness to accept the ten-million-dollar payment indicated that his net worth was considerably smaller than he had professed.

Robert Mueller, the independent counsel investigating Trump’s ties to Russia, explressed some sadness that he was not able to bring his probe to a conclusion. “I don’t know what evidence Trump had against himself, but I guarantee you I had more,” he said.

Meanwhile, the success of Flynt’s cash offer appears to have only emboldened the publisher, who announced that he is now offering twenty million dollars for information leading to the impeachment of Mike Pence.

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Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .

"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)
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Tom Hansen
Moscow, Idaho
  
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