[Vision2020] Happy St. Patrick's Day, Viz

[Tom Hansen]

“The Orange and the Green” by the Irish Rovers
http://www.tomandrodna.com/Irish/Orange_and_Green.mp3

“Oh, it is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

My father was an Ulster man, proud Protestant was he.
My mother was a Catholic girl. From county Cork was she.
They were married in two churches, lived happily enough,
Until the day that I was born. Then, things got rather tough.

Oh, it is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

Baptized by Father Reilly, I was rushed away by car,
To be made a little Orangeman, my father's shining star.
I was christened "David Anthony," but still, inspite of that,
To my father, I was William, while my mother called me Pat.

Oh, it is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

With Mother every Sunday, to Mass I'd proudly stroll.
Then after that, the Orange lodge would try to save my soul.
For both sides tried to claim me, but i was smart because
I'd play the flute or play the harp, depending where I was.

Oh, it is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

One day my Ma's relations came round to visit me.
Just as my father's kinfolk were all sitting down to tea.
We tried to smooth things over, but they all began to fight.
And me, being strictly neutral, I bashed everyone in sight.

Oh, it is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

My parents never could agree about my type of school.
My learning was all done at home, that's why I'm such a fool.
They've both passed on, God rest 'em, but left me caught between
That awful color problem of the Orange and the Green.

Oh, it is the biggest mix-up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.”

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“The Unicorn” by the Irish rovers
http://www.tomandrodna.com/Irish/Unicorn.mp3

“A long time ago, when the Earth was green 
There was more kinds of animals than you've ever seen 
They'd run around free while the Earth was being born 
And the loveliest of all was the unicorn 

There was green alligators and long-necked geese 
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees 
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born 
The loveliest of all was the unicorn 

The Lord seen some sinning and it gave Him pain 
And He says, "Stand back, I'm going to make it rain" 
He says, "Hey Noah, I'll tell you what to do 
Build me a floating zoo, 
and take some of those...

Green alligators and long-necked geese 
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees 
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born 
Don't you forget My unicorns 

Old Noah was there to answer the call 
He finished up making the ark just as the rain started to fall 
He marched the animals two by two 
And he called out as they came through 
Hey Lord, 

I've got green alligators and long-necked geese 
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees 
Some cats and rats and elephants, but Lord, I'm so forlorn 
I just can't find no unicorns" 

And Noah looked out through the driving rain 
Them unicorns were hiding, playing silly games 
Kicking and splashing while the rain was falling 
Oh, them silly unicorns 

There was green alligators and long-necked geese 
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees 
Noah cried, "Close the door because the rain is falling 
And we just can't wait for no unicorns" 

The ark started moving, it drifted with the tide 
The unicorns looked up from the rocks and they cried 
And the waters came down and sort of floated them away 
That's why you never see unicorns to this very day 

You'll see green alligators and long-necked geese 
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees 
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born 
You're never gonna see no unicorns 

Now you might think this is the ending to the song,
But I'll have to tell you friends that in fact you're wrong
You see, Unicorns are magical, so when the rain started pouring,
They grew themselves some wings and they took to soaring.

You'll see green alligators and long-necked geese 
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees 
But if you're looking for the unicorns, don't be forlorn,
The second star to the right and straight on until morning.”

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“A Pub With No Beer” by the Dublin City Ramblers
http://www.tomandrodna.com/Pub_With_No_Beer.mp3

“It's lonesome away from your kindred and all
By the campfire at night where the wild dingos call
But there's nothin' so lonesome, so dull or so drear
Than to stand in the bar of a pub with no beer

Now the publican's anxious for the quota to come
There's a faraway look on the face of the bum
The maid's gone all cranky and the cook's acting queer
What a terrible place is a pub with no beer

The stockman rides up with his dry, dusty throat
He breasts up to the bar, pulls a wad from his coat
But the smile on his face quickly turns to a sneer
When the barman says suddenly: "The pub's got no beer!"

There's a dog on the verandah, for his master he waits
But the boss is inside drinking wine with his mates
He hurries for cover and he cringes in fear
It's no place for a dog round a pub with no beer

Then in comes the swagman, all covered with flies
He throws down his roll, wipes the sweat from his eyes
But when he is told he says, "What's this I hear?
I've trudged fifty flamin' miles to a pub with no beer!"

Old Billy, the blacksmith, the first time in his life
Has gone home cold sober to his darling wife
He walks in the kitchen; she says: "You're early, me dear"
Then he breaks down and he tells her that the pub's got no beer

It's lonesome away from your kindred and all
By the campfire at night where the wild dingos call
But there's nothin' so lonesome, so dull or so drear
Than to stand in the bar of a pub with no beer.”

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Seeya rouind town, Moscow.

Tom O'Hansen
Moscow, Idaho

"People who ridicule others while hiding behind anonymous monikers in chat-
room forums are neither brave nor clever." 

- Latah County Sheriff Wayne Rausch (August 21,
2007)

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